You are currently browsing the monthly archive for October 2007.
Even the best falls down sometimes.
No matter how careful you are, the past comes back to pick up the pieces.
You draw this painting for yourself. Marking here for you, and there for him.
You cross out the paths. The paper crumbles. The water spills.
But I just can’t let you go.
Never say never. You can’t tell this centre here what to do.
I can’t stand how much I need you.
Living in my dreams, I can smile. Even if I don’t hear from you, I have these with me.
Memories. How much are they worth?
I know I can’t move forward without them in tow.
But no one in this world knows me the way you know me.
Without a word.
I’m not questioning this. I don’t want to know the answer. Don’t give out the end. I want this to last.
This fire, as much as it’s solitary.
You may ask, why?
But I can’t put my finger on it.
This time, I may drown and never resurface.
Or I could be living this over and over again, because I just can’t let you go.
Life’s never fair.
Am I asking it to be?
Who can help me now, but myself.
We can’t be afraid to hope.
After all, that’s the last thing we ever think about every night.
There are certain people you just keep coming back to.
I’m hoping not to deny myself of feelings.
These feelings at least.
Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same.
I can smile for this moment, this special place in my heart. Who knows if I’ll never wake up tomorrow.
This life we hope to live, I am living it now. Yearning still for that sense of completion.
But I remember now, life is never complete…without you.
There comes a time when you let go of all the bitterness, when you know there’s no use holding on.
We hope for better days, better mornings. But how many are blessed with that?
My wake up calls certainly haven’t been the same without thoughts of you.
And I know my dreams will have me dying, if I don’t dream of you again.
But the dreams in which I’m dying are the best I’ve ever had.
Sorry to say, but I still do.
*bliss*
It’s never easy for adults to act like one.
To forgive and show off that sincerity, unconditionally.
As we grow older, sometimes our minds grow narrower too. We no longer have the passion inside us to try and try again till we fall down exhausted from our attempts.
Everyday, we chase after what we call ‘dreams’. It is an illusion of the reality we are now facing.
How many times have we lost our minds? Like the laughter will never come back again. But you and I, we both know it eventually will.
Unconditional, what is it?
You don’t remember because it’s not important to you.
Isn’t it?
We wake, and we close our eyes but we still see.
I fall, and I climb back up but I’m still learning.
Nothing comes close to substitution.
Does love last forever?
Yes it does.
Then I’m in big trouble.
Matters of the heart, I dare not question.
There’ll always be somebody for someone.
And I, for myself.
Sit back and listen to this song. Epiphany in melody.
I’ve searched the mountains
The forest and the sea
Seeking the homeland
Of my memories
Haunted by visions
Longing like the sea
Time passes by me
And still I am not free
Lift the veil of Elphame
Let me see the light
Then guide me home tonight
How can I soar alone
When my wings are at rest?
I yearn to be there
In the land of the bless’d
So light me a candle
Watch the dark shadows fade
And I must journey on
For the choice I have made
Lift the veil of Elphame
Let me see the light
Then take me home tonight
My lone heart guides me
Brings me home through the night
Carries me onward
And into the light
To wander the shadows
To see the truth from afar
To sigh in the moonlight
Dancing magic of stars
Lift the veil of Elphame
Let me see the light
Then guide my way tonight.
Magic from my heart.
Searching. Still am.
Who is this face in the mirror? Defined by the scars left over with no purpose.
She walks this earth with no directions, not even a map. Perhaps she prefers surprises?
Usually, they think they’re helping. Notifications for my knowledge or because they can’t keep quiet?
Either way, it’s still up to me. In the end.
The more I try to explain things, the worst it gets. Confusion, is my state of mind.
I’ll wait by my quiet corner. I’ll wait. At this moment, observation is best. I’ll duck my head out only when I know it’s all clear.
There is no hurry. I’ll pace out my pace. In hope that tomorrow will find me something over the water.
Although it’s at a pretty good state now. What better way to enjoy the rest of the year than with this bridge between my eyes.
Maggi anyone?
Movie title of the same name coming out.
Got me thinking, how true can that be?
If he doesn’t really remember to text you, that counts doesn’t it? Or if he feels obligated to.
If he’d rather spend some time with his friends, than make plans with you.
If he’s not ready.
And he talks all night about himself.
Breaking a promise when he doesn’t have to.
Taking too long to answer your messages.
Not suggesting to have dinner when it’s a perfectly good night out.
Prefering to keep Sunday for work.
Actions speak louder than words. Can’t you tell?
She gives me strength. But.
I am not the person who is singing
I am the silent one inside
I am not the one who laughs at people’s jokes
I just pacify their egos
I am not my house, my car, my songs
They are only just stops along my way
I am like the winter
I’m a dark cold female
With a golden ring of wisdom in my cave
Enough is enough? But.
It is me who is my enemy
Me who beats me up
Me who makes the monsters
Me who strips my confidence
When I don’t have enough to live for, I shouldn’t worry about this yet. Who says I can’t make it?
I am carrying my voice
I am carrying my heart
I am carrying my rhythm
I am carrying my prayers
But you can’t kill my spirit
It’s soaring and it’s strong
Like a mountain
I’ll go on and on
But when my wings are folded
The brightly colored moth
Blends into the dirt into the ground
This much is true. But I’m finding it hard to believe.
And it’s me who’s too weak
And it’s me who’s too shy
To ask for the thing I love
What’s over the water, you may ask? Only I know. Only I.
I am walking on the bridge
I am over the water
And I’m scared as hell
But I know there’s something better
Yes I know there’s something
Yes I know, I know, yes I know.
Do I?
It’s fading, I’m recovering.
What heaven’s falling are no longer tears. Rain, just pure simple rain.
Flowers will grow again. Bloom, even. Trees grow tall in years.
But I’ll have my wings before that.
I dream of better beginnings. I can see it in the distant future.
These few days, I can feel it too.
I’d take another chance, take a fall
Take a shot for you
And I need you like a heart needs a beat
But it’s nothin new
I loved you with a fire red
Now it’s turning blue
But I’ll wait for you. I may never find it, who knows. But I’ll wait.
Because heaven told me so.
You’re a stranger still. A shadow. Figment of my imagination. But I know you must exist.
I can’t touch you, and you don’t know my name.
I’ll take this time to grow.
To figure out why it was meant for me to lose, so I could gain back one of you.
Tastebuds hardly change. Some you’re born with, others acquired. Which one for me?
Can hardly tell.
I’m holding on your rope
Got me ten feet off the ground
I’m hearin what you say but I just can’t make a sound
You tell me that you need me
But wait
It’s too late to apologise
It’s too late.
For what I’ve done. I know you know that time changes everything. Feelings can go away.
But they can come back too. I can’t set a date because my clock ain’t working.
I can’t say yes because I know I’ll be lying.
Pushing, pushing off the ground I will lift myself.
No hands to hold but my own.
I sense that you are searching; I am looking for you too. Who will find who first?
Perhaps when we’re both not looking.
Those ripples, clear and tall. My eyes need them. These connect to my heart.
Who are you? Does it matter if I’ve already made a choice?
Pick it up, put it down. Throw it back and wait for its return.
Take out the blender and make your own. Maybe that’s easier.
Though it’s not that hard now anyway.
Yes, we can’t choose who we fall in love with.
But we also cannot choose who’ll fall in love with us.
It’s too late to apologise for all the regrets we still harbour in our hearts.
My best wishes to T & 1.
